Once I discovered my shame filter, the next logical step was to “fix it”. How do I deal with all this negative thinking, low self-esteem and the feeling of unworthiness? After all isn’t that a normal reaction? Here’s the problem……..now go and fix it!
The difficulty is that it’s not a leaky faucet or a worn brakes. There is no changing of a washer or putting on new pads to fix years of shame-based thinking. For me, at 53, this type of behavior had been going on for most of my life. It’s not as though one pep talk – even from the most dynamic speaker in the world – will “cure” years of behavior and emotional traumas then simply “fix” it.
So many issues we deal with took YEARS to solidify. Now that we realize there is a problem, well we just can’t take it to the local mechanic or “shrink” and say “fix it, please”. The first step? It’s quite simple. We must acknowledge that the problem exists. We must understand that there is something that needs “fixing” or even better “changing”. After that? Well you’ll have to tune into the next post.