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Posting My Thoughts

The “Big Boss”


“Critics can be found anywhere but most of the time, a little kindness is what’s truly needed.”

Many of you know my friend Helen S also known as the “Big Boss”. She and her husband own and run a restaurant which honors their proud heritage. Many items from the menu are dishes based on memories from her childhood. You’d be hard-pressed to find better food anywhere in the UK but what get the patrons to return is Helen’s incredible personality and charm. No matter what kind of day she is having, everyone is greeted by her smile.

However, there is nothing on this planet Helen loves more than her daughter, Maria. She often posts pictures of the two of them and like her mother, even when Maria is not feeling well, she always sports a huge smile; one that even surpasses her mother’s!

Maria is 26 years old and was born with a condition that has affected her mental capacity so that she requires constant care, from which Helen has never – and will never – shy away. Raising a family with two older boys was no small feat and she wondered at times if she was paying too much attention to Maria and not enough to her boys. Fortunately, she was assured by both of them told her how proud they were of her and what she did for Maria was incredibly admirable.

Most of us have no idea the dedication and sacrifice it takes to raise a child with such needs. However, what is difficult to understand is why at times, when she posts pictures of her beautiful daughter, some people leave demeaning and negative comments. If you are offended by someone’s love for their child to the point where you must blatantly object, that would indicate that you are the person who really needs the help.

Social media has become an easy platform where many can now “speak out” and feel they are becoming stronger by “telling it like it is”. However, voicing your opinion in such a manner is no a show of strength but rather an act of cowardice. Taking shots at a defenseless person may work in a comedy act or a scripted “reality TV” show but it is certainly not the sign of a decent and caring human being.

I’ll be the first one to admit that I don’t agree with everything Helen posts but there is no compulsion to write about it. Showing restraint and discretion is a far better attribute than spreading negativity and malice. This is an unfortunate sign of our times where we are constantly barraged with supposed “leaders” using this type of rhetoric to show their power. But instead, it invites divisiveness, exclusivity, and hatred rather than a uniting and empowering those whom they lead. It is easy to be critical but criticism becomes hard when you aspire to be kind. Kindness is what this world needs more and that happens one human being at a time.

Thanks to Helen and Maria. Please feel free to disagree with me and state your reasons but do not write anything derogatory about Helen or Maria. Thank you.

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