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The Kindness Failure

Photo By Paul Morris


“Being kind to someone who may not deserve it, is a show of strength which no muscle can produce.”  

Last week, my article titled “The Kindness Factor” (click here to read it) asserted that being kind is something upon which we all can improve.  Furthermore, it contended that attempting to resolve disputes using aggressive behavior rather than being kind, could be an indication of a negative and undesirable character issue.

Fundamentally, kindness does not equate to weakness. Although many will want to seize on that type of behavior, they are the ones who are showing weakness. Loud and brash behavior may be entertaining to watch, but it should be reserved for reality television and not as a go-to negotiating tool.

When someone is seen as speaking loudly and confrontationally, it is often assumed to be a formidable and uncompromising act. It is as though the one shouting the loudest wins. Unfortunately, this conduct is extolled far too often and by too many; incorrectly construed as “telling it like it is.”

Nevertheless, when telling it like it is implies degrading or humiliating someone, that is a display of an overinflated ego and a weak mind. Raising one’s voice to win an argument reveals that person has run out of ammunition so to speak and cannot maintain composure; allowing frustration to direct the argument. Disputes are not won in a shouting match. What does occur, however, is to create even more division and ultimately make it more difficult for any agreement.

There is a very good reason the “Golden Rule” states we are to “do to others what you would want done to you.” What it does NOT declare is “do to them what they have done to you.” Responding with kindness when confronted by aggressive behavior, takes strength and mental fortitude. And because that person is likely trying to antagonize you, a calm and considerate response is prone to catch the other person off guard.

Admittedly, it can be difficult in every situation but understand that when a person exudes loud and confrontational behaviors, it is a blaring depiction of a highly inflated ego that was truthfully spawned to cover up low self-esteem.  Confidence doesn’t require a fanfare, and self-assurance needs no stage. Conviction and passion look for resolutions, and those seeking truth do not at the same time look to blame, accuse, or denounce.

If there is a global failure occurring, it is the lack of kindness shown to fellow human beings. In nearly every global conflict, what lies at the heart of the problems are egos demanding to be right. Forcing on others religion, political views, economic maneuvering, most of which can be traced back to those who have allowed arrogance to reign over kindness, usually done because of their untethered self-importance.

This week, really endeavor to be kind, even in situations which may warrant opposite responses, show compassion, and pass it along. It is something in which we ALL can participate and make this world a better place.

My thanks to Paul Morris on Unsplash for the beautiful photo and I look forward to your comments.

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